Can’t take it back

“You don’t like me do you?” he asked.

It was late. We had been running all night, he had been drinking all night. He smelled. We smelled. He smelled worse. A lot worse. Days of piss dried onto filthy clothing reeks. It fills the back of the rescue instantly, making me retch.

I could have said, “No, I don’t.”

Having somebody dislike you is far better than not being seen at all.

I could have said, “Of course I like you, you are a fellow human being, and I’m here to help you get back on your feet, brother.”

Everybody needs a little kindness now and then.

I could have said, as I’ve told him before, “I don’t necessarily dislike you.”

That’s better than nothing.

Instead I chose the worst possible thing to say.

“I don’t care enough about you to like or dislike you. You simply don’t matter to me one way or the other.”

9I knew what I said was the last thing he needed. I said it anyway.

He looked crushed.

Sorry about that, Kevin, sometimes I can be a first class idiot.

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